I just finished writing the first-draft of a novel, ‘SoulDice’, and am going to let it sit for a week, as I do with all projects I finish, before I go back to it for the first edit.
And then it hits.
The post-goal sink-hole.
I wake up totally devoid of any creative energy.
I really just can’t be arsed. It’s like a cloud descends, sits over me and just rains a fine, misty rain on me, draining me of any will to get back in to being creative.
It feels like the onset of depression.
But that’s stupid right? I mean I’ve just ‘achieved’ something right? So I should be feeling all energised, bouncy, looking forward to the next stage and the next thing… right?
It never happens that way for me. I always go through a period of post-goal downside.
And I know repeatedly using the phrase ‘post-goal’ will slightly annoy my British footy-fan friends as it sounds too much like, well, you know.
I know what I’m supposed to do, from all the mentoring, coaching and team-building I’ve done in a professional capacity as a trainer / manager: as the project approaches completion, I should goal-set through the completion date, start thinking about and then planning the ‘next thing’.
The next thing for ‘SoulDice’ is the first edit, tightening, checking and taking out a whole lot of stuff that is either holding a place for something better, or is, to be brutally honest, just waffle.
It means I’ll have to put on my ‘ruthless head’, I’ll have to be prepared to let stuff go, admit to myself that some of it just isn’t up to scratch. Maybe that’s why it’s hard to see past completion? Because I know I’m going to have to be tough on myself?
I’ve been through this before, and I’ll go through it again. And that’s a big help in getting through it. That and the fact that I learned many (many) years ago to forgive myself for the bad stuff, to just let it happen then go and make it better.
For now I can’t think of anything really creative. But it will pass.
Maybe my next project will be a story about a writer and the pain they put themselves through…? Nah! That would just be too hard!