One of the themes for the Banbury Café Writers’ Group assignments is ‘connections’.

I am finding it hard to get going on it, hard to get the traction to get moving: I have an idea I like but am not sure where to go with it.

I’ve written out a few pages of brainstorming stuff but still don’t feel (ironically enough) connected to it.

This is the time I should let things go.

So… having just said that… I will… I have a couple of other ideas forming, so I’ll give them a workout, see where they lead.

This is not usually how I work. I usually work from the end to the front: I know what the ending will be, who the characters are, and what the rough journey is, but I have the ending fixed.

This ‘just write stuff down and see where it goes’ is pretty new to me. I suspect it will not end well, but have dumped that negativity and am sticking with it.

One connection that has become very apparent while I’m tinkering with ideas is the one between creativity and judgement.

Odd that.

Came out of nowhere.

Creating something is hard. It’s all kinds of hard! I’ll focus on writing as it’s what I primarily know in the creative process, but the following ramblings could apply to almost any creative endeavour.

I never think about the end response when I start writing. I never think ‘I really want people to like this,’ or ‘this will really be popular!’ I do when it’s ‘work’ writing, that is different: work is about getting it bought, getting people to pay for it, so the more people that like it the more it will be successful, and that’s what ‘work’ is about.

But then I thought, ‘wait, what!?’ That’s not right at all! I never create stuff with a view to just putting it away where no one can see it. I always write with a view to getting it out there. So I should be thinking about the end consumer, whether work-related or not.

And I know I’m only fooling myself when I say I don’t. Course I do.

I know not every creative person and their endeavour is like that, but I am and mine are: I want to share.

Sharing means being judged.

Is that just a cynical voice whispering in my ear or a fact I’d rather forget shouting a reminder to me?

I started wondering about the connection: creativity and judgement. Is it something that holds some people back and prevents them from even trying to express their creative idea? Or is it something that only occurs after the creative fact? Do we have that in our subconscious while we are creating? Do some have it more at the forefront of their mind while creating?

It’s a tough question to ask at a writers’ group, but ask it I shall.